Sad Elephants, a Wonderful Man and a Dream for Me.

The Yoga classes in the mountains were great and so was the teacher!  It was a type of yoga I had never done before; in fact, I had never even heard of it until I saw it on the sign... but it was fantastic.  It concentrates on opening all of your chakras and wow... do you ever feel fantastic after class...lighter, cleaner and just all around great!

The studio...if you didn't know what it was (which I hadn't up until
this point) you would think it was just a big tarpaulin tent...however when you went inside it was this cute little studio with a few mats  and felt laid out on a cement floor.  Shawls hanging along the wall to give it some colour and
one side completely open to the beautiful  mountain view... it was the perfect place.

We did this for a few mornings and then went for a nice brunch as I was always hungry afterward ... of course.

Our last morning we sat with our wonderful teacher in his garden, drinking tea with mint pulled fresh from his garden.  We talked about life and yoga enjoying the moment with an incredible view of the mountains... life is good.

I took an overnight bus to Delhi...and it was a shitty bus!!! First I had to walk from the hostel up the rocky road (no, not the ice cream), in the dark to get a cab...thank goodness the guy from the hostel carried my backpack and guided the way because I would still be there lost and crying hahaha.

The bus...well...let''s just say it wasn't my best bus experience in all the years I have traveled...however I did meet some awesome people so it has a bonus side...plus I got a story out of it ... another bonus.

I usually spend more money on a bus for comfort but the hostel could only book with this company and I wasn't walking down to Macleodganj until the next day and that's when I wanted my ticket for so I decided to go with it.

It was a pure traveler bus...I saw people from the meditation course and other I hadn't seen before.  It was just a bunch of travelers so it meant the bus wasn't full and I had an empty seat next to me...score...this means I could stretch out and get a better nights sleep.  WRONG!!!  The bus was so bumpy... it had no shock absorber's so it bounced and shook.  I was getting a big motion sick and the girl a few rows up was vomiting into a plastic bag.... it was cold with her window open but it felt good and helped me feel better.  I think she puked the better part of the trip.

We bounced all night...at one point I saw my computer bag in the middle of the isle along with my shoes.  My tea holder went flying out of my hands and I  couldn't find it but the guy in front of me handed it back.   The seats were silky so when I found a decent position I would just slide right out of it.  Bumps had us flying out of our seat... so a sleep ... even a decent sleep seemed very far out of my reach for the night.

We did however arrive two hours early.... let me explain.   In India you are usually on time, or late but never early.... so... he was driving like a speed demon... just like our driver to Taj Mahal... trust me you can feel it in a bus especially when it's bumby.  I didn't mind though it cut our drive from 12 hours to 10 hours.  The guys at the hostel were great...they woke up and let us check in which was great.

I met two others on the bus.  Kirsten and Benny.  Benny had been talking about staying at a guest house which was close to where we were.  It was $3 a night but I would've paid $3 just to not stay there.  There was mold absorbed into the white walls,  the communal toilet had old cigarettes on the floor and I didn't even want to have a look at the shower.  The bed room looked a bit like a jail cell.  Benny stayed there but bought new sheets and blankets and Kirsten stayed with me at the hostel.

It was  nice day we went for lunch and dinner.... I booked my bus for the next day..... I did another cheap one because it wasn't an overnight trip and then went to bed.

I caught my 7:30am bus the next morning and was on my way to Delhi to meet up with James (met him in Delhi when I first arrived).  Just like last time, he was the first face I saw when I entered the hostel.  We had drinks that night...well, we had to buy them under-the-table as it was a dry day.  I felt the beer the next morning (and the cigarettes - I know, I know) but I wasn't bad...and we were off to Jaipur.

Our bus trip was 6 hours.  James had booked our bus and went expensive so we had a nice bus... well not the nicest I have had but at least nicer than my overnight bus.  We arrived in Jaipur around 5, hopped in a tuk-tuk and went to the hostel.    We went for dinner with one of our roommates to a restaurant just up the road from the hostel that the owner had recommended.  It doesn't look like much from inside or outside but of course the food was great!

The next morning I was up early to do my yoga practice and our roommate joined me, and while we were practicing two other girls asked if they could have a class with me the next morning.  I of course said yes but ended up sleeping in so it didn't happen.

The next day we planned a city tour...the tuk-tuk driver had given us his number so I had messaged him with a list of places we wanted to go and he said okay for a very good price - $20.

We went to the Amber fort - we don't know anything about it really because we didn't get a guide but I took some awesome pictures.  There were elephants there.  I cried when I saw them.  The elephants are beaten and treated horribly.   It is always female elephants because they are less aggressive than the males.  They are painted to look colourful and fun. People pay to sit in the basket on top and ride them.  Elephants look like they have a strong stable back but they don't.  They walk slowly and sadly, you can literally feel how sad they are as they walk through the crowd and the people on top smiling and laughing because they are riding an elephant.

Their trunks are white down the center.  In order to get the paint off they are scrubbed with rocks resulting in their trunks fading.  It's really awful how animals are treated in many countries around the world, it's heart breaking... they have literally broken these animals just for a joy ride...it's awful.


We went to the Floating Palace.  From my understanding a man of stature - a long time ago built it for his wife.  She wanted place to hangout so he built her a house out in the middle of the water.  There used to be tours out to it however, there are crocodiles in the water and a few years ago a tourist ... well, I'm sure I don't have to continue the story.  It wasn't a happy ending so they stopped the tours.



We went to some step wells.  Back in the day, the people used to get their water from step wells.  They would take buckets and go down to the water line.  They are really beautiful and still in good condition... the one we were at reminded me of the scene in Labyrinth.

We visited the Monkey Temple which was my favourite.  When you enter the area it doesn't smell great, there are lots of dog and the people, I think they live there,  its not the nicest looking place.  And, of course, there are monkeys, everywhere.  There are so many, even on the walk up they are on the road and the stone wall that lines the road.  They still make me nervous, I'm always afraid they are going to attack even though I know they are used to humans.  The red faced ones are the aggressive ones and unfortunately these are the most common.  You just have to walk slowly and don't make I contact or smile at them, then you will be in trouble.

We got blessed at the top and then went and looked out at Jaipur from the top.

Jaipur is a pretty city.  The buildings are bigger and in better shape than the places I have been to in India.  The streets are cleaner along with the buildings... it seems richer and you can see it in everything...though of course it is still polluted...you can see it sitting over the city.  We stood there looking out for I don't know how long.  I watched kids on their rooftops fly their kites and twirl around.  It was really calming watching the city and listening to the far off sounds of the car horns and other city sounds.

We drove through the Pink city... all the buildings in the city are...well...pink!  Rajasthan (the state we are in)  has cities of different colours, and Jaipur has the Pink City.

I had been very clear with our driver that we just wanted to go to the places on our list and that we didn't want to be taken to any places where he would get commission ... he was offended and said he was not like that ... but.... lol.  He made up excuses, the restaurant we wanted to go to was too far so he took us to a really good place that he knew about.... it was awesome ... but already against what I had told him.  I wanted to go to a market and look at jewelry as Jaipur is known for it's amazing jewelry.  "Nope, there are no markets like that, they won't be authentic I can take you to a factory!"  We told him to just take us back to the hostel.... he had said okay the night before.... ah well, next time.  Yes there will be a next time, I'm going back, I will explain that next.

The next day I was going on a tour with the owner of the hostel.   He runs his own NGO.  He has an after school program for children, and classes for women to get educated....here they learn how to read, write, and do mathematics.   They also learn how to sew.  He gets organic cotton and left over material from companies that are going to throw away their scraps.  Then the women make clothing and other things...one being all the bed linens for the hostel.  He also takes designs from Pinterest and they make the clothing and sell it.  Some girls who have visited the hostel before have started their own Etsy business with their clothing.  I even bought a few things myself that they made to fit me and had it for me within 4 hours.  One of the women now runs her own business and can do her own books!

The people he helps are from the slum areas of Jaipur.  He has three day cares where the children range from 3-6 or 7.  He sings with them and teaches them English.

He had done all of this in 4 years with no support from the government.  Everything he makes goes back into each project and whatever little money is left over goes towards his other project.  A school.  There is a building that he wants to buy and fix up so he can have the children from all 3 day cares bused to one school.  He take everything and gives it back to others... his wife teaching the women to sew and his 8 year old daughter helping where she can.   He buys all the schools supplies, gets used clothing, purchases sewing machines whenever he can.  He has no sponsors or government funding.  He doesn't have a website as he doesn't want to become famous, he just wants to help others as best he can.  He is an incredible man and very inspiring.  So inspiring I am going back for 10 days.  I will be in the day cares, 3 days at each.  I will be teaching the little ones English through games and songs.  He is not a teacher so I want to give him a template and some ideas for the classroom!  Also,  a dream of mine for a long time has been to start a school in the slums of India and teach English voluntarily.  When I walked in to the little day care I thought, this is literally my dream. The kids were just amazing, excited to learn, my heart melted and I was almost brought to tears.  Right then I knew I needed to stay.  I couldn't walk away from something like this.  So after talking to the owner I am going back for 10 days to work with the little ones and I will also be doing morning yoga classes at the hostel for free room and board.  I am so excited!!! This is literally a dream come true!


There was a really nice Dutch couple on the tour and we ended up going to a bar with them that night.  The owner took us, had a small sip of tequila and left.  We had a few drinks before they called last call at 11:45pm. 

While we sat enjoying our drinks we were invited by our neighbouring table to join in a celebration where they fed us cake.

Our cab ride home called us cheaters because he went the wrong way.  Here, you get a set price before you take a cab... but in this case it was an Uber.  He got turned around and then wanted more money and called us cheaters. 

First however, its a couple other cities with James before we split off for 12 days and then I am meeting him in Goa.  Yesterday we took a short 3 hour bus ride to Pushkar.  We took a sleeper bus - though we were in seats - and they are pretty awesome so I am going to take one back to Jaipur so I can sleep and have my own little space.

Again, our driver - this time being a tuk-tuk driver - tried getting more money out of us.  He took us to the wrong place and then when he dropped us off asked for more money because he went to the wrong place saying "you only told me what place you wanted to go after we went to the wrong one."  Clearly I didn't I wouldn't give the wrong name of a hostel for fun.  Ughh... man, I'm having to be tough here and its giving me bad vibes in my soul but sometimes you really need to be stern.....pfft.

Today and tomorrow we are going to explore....we are waiting for our Dutch friends to arrive as they are joining us here and we are also meeting up with a friend we met in Delhi.

More adventures await.

                                                      - My Beautiful Life -

Disconnected-Reconnecting-Mountain Meditation

Well I did it, I graduated from my Yoga course, I am certified to teach yoga, isn't that exciting?!?!

I'm not going to lie.  By the third week in my yoga course I was struggling.  I was struggling with myself.  I expected this huge life changing experience and having the best time of my life but I felt the opposite.  I felt disconnected not just from myself but from everyone, even Julie. Don't get me wrong we were close but I felt like I was missing something... I felt completely lack of emotions and I was really struggling with this.

I went through my days focused but didn't really want to be around anyone (unless it was Julie).

We graduated and I barely felt anything.  I didn't care about the party or taking group photos.  I didn't feel a bond with anyone and even though I had learned a lot and felt great physically it didn't really bother me that we were finished a parting ways.

Why was I feeling like this?

I was happy to be moving out of the school and into a hostel - different from where some of the other girls were staying.  I didn't want to hang out with them,  I really just wanted to be on my own and do my own thing and just be around other people.

I had met a few people during the time of my course so I was hanging out with them but other than that I was hanging out at cafe's and going to morning classes with some of the girls which I didn't mind.  We would go for lunch after class but I felt detached and felt awkward in a conversation. I was having negative responses to most things and I was holding on to them...even if it was something small.  For example... my two dorm mates were going to a yoga class that I was interested in.  They stated they had to leave early to get money exchanged and I said I would spot them as it was too early to exchange money.  Next thing I know they are gone!!!  They left without me, so I leave and head to the studio.  I see them at a a cafe so I stop.  "You left without me!"  "We waited downstairs for you but you took too long."  " You didn't tell me you were going downstairs to wait you just left.  It's kind of rude after I offered to pay for you."  I was annoyed but waited for them while they ordered and chatted a bit with one of the shop owners I know.  I look over, they were drinking their coffee there, we were already running late so I said I would see them there.   I start walking and not 5 minutes later they go by me on a motorbike!  Seriously?!?!  I looked at my watch... I wasn't going to make it on time and why show up and pay for them screw them.  So I turned around.  Just I started walking the shop owner I had just been speaking to pulled up on his bike, asked were I was going and offered me a lift!  Honestly, I feel safer on the motorbikes than I do walking the streets, it's very easy to get run over when you are on foot.

I thanked him for the ride and went up to the class and it was completely full...well I guess they still met karma.  One apologized to me the next day, I said it was rude and I just had no respect but it didnt really affect my life.  Though it had pissed me off for awhile!

I went through my days dully, not really being here or there or feeling happy or sad, just being present.

I spent Diwali with a friend, we went for dinner at a cafe and then went down to The Gangas to watch fire works.  A dog joined us for a bit and then left.  He then returned but you could tell the sounds of the fireworks were scaring him so I started petting him, he got up and curled into me and stayed with us the rest of the time.  He then walked me part way home.  It was a really nice night.  It was nice to be away from everyone else and be with someone who was separate from the school but I still felt a bit disconnected.

Another friend I had met out side of the school only got the negative side of me because I was just so on edge most of the time.

Even when Julie left I felt sad but I didn't feel the attachment I thought I would and it was really strange.

I did meet a wonderful woman at my hostel who I had an outing with.  We went around Rishikesh had lunch, looked for a bank that accepted my bank card (no luck) and went to a cafe.  We kept running into people that I knew and she thought it was funny "you have definitely been here awhile!" However, I still didn't feel like me.

All of this was feeling weird and uncomfortable so I was really looking forward to going North to the mountains.  Ellen (one of the girls from my class) and Sergio a guy from the hostel hopped on a 13 hour night bus and headed North.

It was a little frustrating when we got here as it is off season so everything is pretty much shut down but...I LOVE IT HERE!!!  I am finally feeling like me.  The view here is fantastic, it's quiet, I am able to do asana (yoga in the Western World) on the roof top patio with a mountainous view.  Great food, beer (hahah) and I can focus.  I have gotten so much work done and just come back into myself.

A few days ago I walked to the next town - Macleodgang - and had a wonderful day.  I wandered the streets going in and out of the shops.  I really wanted a Tibetan Singing Bowl and ended up in this shop where I spent an hour speaking to the owner.  He showed me different ways of using the singing bowls and then told me about a Guru who gave classes for sound healing.  So after a purchase and many methods of healing I went to the ashram and met with the guru and talked about doing a course with him - I am just not sure when yet.

I then went into a restaurant, Nick's Italian Restaurant, for some lunch and it was starting to rain.  I was asked to sit at a table with a woman who I ended up speaking with for an hour.  We had such a wonderful time!  We parted ways and I met up with David (met him at the hostel my second night) and we had Chai and then took his motor bike back up the mountain and then when for a drink at one of the cafe's.  I was waiting for the rain to let up as it had started again but to no avail.  So I decided I wasn't going to melt and walked back in the rain with no flashlight as my phone had died...but hey... I didn't melt.

Now, it is Sunday, I have been here for 9 days and I just finished a meditation course, Cultivating Mindfulness and Emotional Balance, at the well known meditation centre Tushita.  It was exactly what I needed and opened my awareness to a lot of things.  No, this wasn't a planned thing, in fact, it was last minute.  Two of the girls here said they were going to sign up for a meditation course and I asked to go with them.  I looked at the name of it and thought I could use some emotional balance, and signed up.

It was from 9am to 430pm Friday to Sunday.  A ten minute walk from the hostel and if I left early enough which I did day 2 and 3 I was able to get a cinnamon roll and a chai from the Himalayan Tea shop.  The whole day was done in silence which was amazing.  It was so nice enjoying the afternoon sun in silence listening to literally every sound around you.  By the third day, sounds that would usually annoy me didn't bother me at all - the sound of people eating, spoons clicking in metal bowls.  I heard monkeys moving around in the trees and as two birds flew over head I actually heard their wings!!! It was amazing.

I feel like what I was expecting at the school was what I got the past three days....meditation wise.  I have a better understanding of myself and how to work with situations.

During discussions I realized that as much as we are on this 3 day journey together are all on our own life journeys and here for different or similar reasons.  People come to India for .... enlightenment? I don't know but we all are trying to understand something and it was really beautiful.

I have a better understanding and foundation of meditation.  In fact, I was even able to clear my mind for a few seconds and sit in awareness,  I was so excited about this that internally I was shouting you've done it!!!  You became aware and are not paying attention to your thoughts...oh wait, these are thoughts..damn it! Now I...would you shut up!  Then I had to start again, but its okay, it was a stepping stone.  I really feel like I have come back to myself and feel really great!  It's really hard to explain the feeling.

As soon as it was over, the guy I had been sitting next to for the three days turned to me and said "I"m Fabrizio by the way."  I smiled.  You are with someone for three days but have no contact so it was nice to exchange words.

After a few of us went for dinner and had a nice time.  We are all meeting up at 7am for a yoga class.  Yup, 7.  The sign said 7 but when we called to make sure it was open he said 11, we asked for earlier and he said 9.  We said 7 was best so with a huffing breath he said "fine, you come at 7!"

I believe how I was feeling about everything was a challenge, a deliberate one from The Universe, wanting me to experience challenges and finding this course to help me understand more.  If I learned anything this year it was in Mexico as we all know how well that started for me.  No matter what The Universe throws at you, be excited for the outcomes ... and excited I am!!!

Mountain life has been good for me and I am so grateful for the challenges I experienced and what I have overcome to get to this point.

                                                    - My Beautiful Life -

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